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What I’ve Learned in Five Years of Marriage

My husband and I celebrated our fifth wedding anniversary recently. Five years in the school of love has merited some sharing on what I’ve learned..  and what I’m still learning. 1. Suffering together is a surprisingly effective way to grow closer (try juggling multiple crying babies/toddlers night after night for months/years) 2. Structure and family…

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Five Prejudices You May Not Realize You Have

Most of us absorb the attitudes and prejudices we have grown up around.  Until we reach a place of self-reflection, we may continue to carry these when searching for and evaluating potential spouses. 1. Prejudices against darker-skinned people Colorism is deeply rooted in most Indians. People think fairness increases both your beauty and your value.…

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What’s Wrong With Traditional Indian Matchmaking Services

Image by freepic.diller on Freepik A friend recently sent me a ‘Catholic’ matrimonial form that included spaces to fill in caste, salary, figure, weight and complexion. Though we can’t be sure of the authenticity of that particular form, it’s similar enough to many actual Indian matrimonial services that I thought it warranted a critique. I…

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What’s the Perfect Number of Children in a Catholic Family?

Spoiler: there is no perfect or ideal number. Catholic marriage tip: Don’t idolize or idealize a certain number of kids. Whether it’s a typical Indian ‘two child only’ plan, or an ‘only big families are truly open to life’, both attitudes are missing the mark. God’s perfect plan is usually not society’s perfect plan- one…

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How To Prepare to Be a Godly Spouse

1. Take your prayer life and sacramental life seriously now Set aside a daily time to pray, journal, read God’s word and seek God’s guidance for your decisions and struggles. Go to Mass regularly, be reverent and attentive to God’s presence in the Word and the Blessed Sacrament. Go to Confession monthly. 2. Seek godly…

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How to End and Exit the ‘Talking Stage’ Gracefully

Too many people find themselves in awkward or uncomfortable situations when they talk to a potential spouse and then realize that they don’t have the connection they hoped they would find. It’s tempting to ghost the other person and just try to fade away without ever directly talking about it. But that leaves the other…

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One More CDMS Wedding

A few weeks ago we shared about CDMS’ first success story. They were not the only ones! The same month saw another CDMS couple exchange vows in Goa. Awina and Shawnal share a little of their story here: What inspired you to sign up for CDMS?“We got to know about CDMS through some common friends.…

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CDMS’ First Success Story

Today I’m excited to highlight CDMS’ first success story- Dion and Wavelin. Dion and Wavelin were both praying and looking for a specific list of qualities in a spouse. They both came across CDMS, and signed up. Part of signing up of for CDMS is filling in a very detailed form about what you are…

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Does a Woman Have to Submit to her Husband?

American Catholic prolife activist Lila Rose recently posted a surprisingly controversial statement: Do not date or marry a man obsessed with the submission of a woman. There was a lot of pushback against her statement as if it wasn’t something obviously true. It seems like many online Catholics and Christians have become so attached to…

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Will You Always Be 100% Sure About The Right Person?